Kit for Disguise

Divine Presence

As the time of Christmas draws near, I would like to share my favourite passages from this marvelous book "The Power of Now" which I am led to recently by these funny twists and turns in life. It is an international bestseller but I would not have chanced upon it myself in the bookstore since I don't have a habit of hanging out at the spirituality section (manga section, more likely) nor the bestseller stand. It is affiliated to no religion, although it quotes from various religious teachings. Here we go:

"..A word is no more than a means to an end. It's an abstraction. Not unlike a signpost, it points beyond itself. The word honey isn't honey. You can study and talk about honey for as long as you like, but you won't really know it until you taste it. After you have tasted it, the word becomes less important to you. You won't be attached to it anymore. Similarly, you can talk or think about God continuously for the rest of your life, but does that mean you know or have even glimpsed the reality to which the word points? It is no more than an obsessive attachment to a signpost, a mental idol.

The reverse also applies: If, for whatever reason, you disliked the word honey, that might prevent you from ever tasting it. If you have a strong aversion to the word God, which is a negative form of attachment, you may be denying not just the word but also the reality to which it points. You would be cutting yourself off from the possibility of experiencing that reality...So, if a word doesn't work for you anymore, then drop it and replace it with one that does work.

...Never personalise Christ. Don't make Christ into a form identity...If you are drawn to an enlightened teacher, it is because there is already enough presence in you to recognise the presence in another. There are many people who did not recognise Jesus or the Buddha, as there are and always have been many people who are drawn to false teachers. Egos are drawn to bigger egos. Darkness cannot recognise light. Only light can recognise light. So do not believe that the light is outside you or that it can only come through one particular form. If only your master is an incarnation of God, then who are you? Any kind of exclusitivity is identification with form, and identification with form means ego, no matter how well disguised...Use the master's presence to reflect your own identity beyond name and form back to you and to become more intensely present yourself. You will realise that there is no "mine" or "yours" in presence. Presence is one.

...Don't get attached to any one word. You can substitute "Christ" for presence, if it is more meaningful to you. Christ is your God-essence or the Self, as it is sometimes called in the East. The only difference between Christ and presence is that Christ refers to your indwelling divinity regardless of whether you are conscious of it or not, whereas presence means your awakened divinity or God-essence...Many misunderstandings and false beliefs about Christ will clear if you realise that there is no past or future in Christ...God said:"I AM THAT I AM." No time here, just presence...It is a Zen-like statement of great profundity...beyond the consciousness dimension governed by time, into the realm of timeless. The dimension of eternity had come into this world. Eternity, of course, does not mean endless time, but no time.

The word God has become empty of meaning through thousands of years of misuse. I use it sometimes, but I do so sparingly. By misuse, I mean that people who have never glimpsed the realm of the sacred, the infinite vastness behind that word, use it with great conviction, as if they knew what they are talking about. Or they argue against it, as if they knew what it is they are denying. This misuse gives rise to absurd beliefs, and egoic delusions such as "My or our God is the only true God, and your God is false," or Nietzsche's famous statement "God is dead."

The word God has become a closed concept. The moment the word is uttered, a mental image is created, no longer, perhaps, of an old man with a white beard, but still a mental representation of someone or something outside of you, and yes, almost inevitably a male someone or something.

Neither God nor Being nor any other word can define or explain the ineffable reality behind the word, so the only important question is whether the word is a help or a hindrance in enabling you to experience That towards which it points. Does it point beyond itself to that transcendental reality, or does it lend itself too easily to becoming no more than an idea in your head that you believe in, a mental idol?

The word Being explains nothing, but nor does God. Being however has the advantage of being an open concept. It does not reduce the infinite invisibility to a finite entity. It is impossible to form a mental image of it. Nobody can claim exclusive possession of Being. It is your very own essence, and it is immediately accessible to you as the feeling of your own presence, the realisation I am that is prior to I am this or I am that. So it is only a small step from the word Being to the experience of Being."

Merry Christmas, my friends.

Sheep, Angels and the Mexican Guy at the Bar

Budak Pantai's concert was a tad of a disappointment. I went for their first show. It might have been the nerves on opening nite, the guys rushed through their songs and diction was muffled in many parts of the singing. With that, much of the humour and punch lines were missed, especially by those who were there for the first time to watch them. I almost want to believe it was the poor sound system. It did not help that Danny strummed his guitar in many of the songs which further interfered with the singing. I expected acapella, not such pollution. I was surprised their song about the cake fell flat and untotally unfunny. It had never happened before in any of their shows I attended.

I suspect Michael came up with a lot of the gimmicks which were unnecessary. They could pull it off in a small crowd but to an audience of this size, it didn't connect. Things improved after the recess, they relaxed and expressed relief that people returned. Har, dare to say! Their tickets this year were so expensive. Last yr, I paid $40 and was in the stall, 5th row from the stage. This year, the same seats were over $100. I bought the $30 ticket and landed in circle 2! My friend, a first time audience, said that we were lucky to have gotten only the $30 tickets, it was not worth anything more than that. It was a great pity they failed to impress. The positive side is Gordon's voice has improved and sounds more confident with the chinese numbers.

Week before Christmas

The past week has been a flurry of activities that there has been no time to even check personal emails. Finally, a break today to be spent all on my own to clear all sorts of personal backlogs. Probably strange to some people cos Xmas eve is the day to spend with family. For me it is the other way round. Everyday spent with family, today take break.

Anyway, last Sat kicked off with me attending two performances in a day - Sleeping Beauty, and Budak Pantai's acapella concert. Followed by a highschool friend's birthday dinner at the (anything but) My Humble House the next nite. The rest of the week progressed with an attendance at the wake of a friend's father, preview of the show 'Promise', a pre-Christmas dinner with childhood friends at the Tanglin Club, met up with a friend working at Esplanade who wanted advice about archiving, went to a colleague's X'mas party. So it has been a week of variety and mixed feelings, but mostly feeling gratitude for all that is received.

Catch no Ball

My first introduction to this poem - Auguries of Innocence - was some years ago where the first four lines were shown on the discovery channel as a teaser.

"To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour."

Wah..so profound, so beautiful. It was only a couple of days ago that I came across the full poem and the title. I do wonder if this is a well-known poem ; don't know cos never got much exposure to Lit. I was a science student and had cleverly selected geography over literature. My literature sucked; my perceptibility was highly under-developed then. At least with geography, there is no guesswork, I know if I studied. With Lit, even if I studied, I still don't know. Know what I mean, No?

So now looking at the full poem, beyond the four lines, the rest of it is like a bag of childhood delights that conjures up all sorts of strange and wonderful imaginery but somehow just falls beyond my grasp of full comprehension. Perhaps William Blake was not really trying to say anything, he was just toying with the words like a clever game? To me it is like, you know how, when you study Chinese, each character on the line makes sense to you but try and decipher the whole line with all the characters together, the meanings seems to make sense but yet, not quite make sense gelled.

Auguries of Innocence

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.

A Robin Red breast in a Cage
Puts all Heaven in a Rage.

A dove house fill'd with doves & Pigeons
Shudders Hell thro' all its regions.

A dog starv'd at his Master's Gate
Predicts the ruin of the State.

A Horse misus'd upon the Road
Calls to Heaven for Human blood.

Each outcry of the hunted Hare
A fibre from the Brain does tear.

A Skylark wounded in the wing,
A Cherubim does cease to sing.

The Game Cock clipp'd and arm'd for fight
Does the Rising Sun affright.

Every Wolf's & Lion's howl
Raises from Hell a Human Soul.

The wild deer, wand'ring here & there,
Keeps the Human Soul from Care.

The Lamb misus'd breeds public strife
And yet forgives the Butcher's Knife.

The Bat that flits at close of Eve
Has left the Brain that won't believe.

The Owl that calls upon the Night
Speaks the Unbeliever's fright.

He who shall hurt the little Wren
Shall never be belov'd by Men.

He who the Ox to wrath has mov'd
Shall never be by Woman lov'd.

The wanton Boy that kills the Fly
Shall feel the Spider's enmity.

He who torments the Chafer's sprite
Weaves a Bower in endless Night.

The Catterpillar on the Leaf
Repeats to thee thy Mother's grief.

Kill not the Moth nor Butterfly,
For the Last Judgement draweth nigh.

He who shall train the Horse to War
Shall never pass the Polar Bar.

The Beggar's Dog & Widow's Cat,
Feed them & thou wilt grow fat.

The Gnat that sings his Summer's song
Poison gets from Slander's tongue.

The poison of the Snake & Newt
Is the sweat of Envy's Foot.

The poison of the Honey Bee
Is the Artist's Jealousy.

The Prince's Robes & Beggars' Rags
Are Toadstools on the Miser's Bags.

A truth that's told with bad intent
Beats all the Lies you can invent.

It is right it should be so;
Man was made for Joy & Woe;
And when this we rightly know
Thro' the World we safely go.

Joy & Woe are woven fine,
A Clothing for the Soul divine;
Under every grief & pine
Runs a joy with silken twine.

The Babe is more than swadling Bands;
Throughout all these Human Lands
Tools were made, & born were hands,
Every Farmer Understands.

Every Tear from Every Eye
Becomes a Babe in Eternity.

This is caught by Females bright
And return'd to its own delight.

The Bleat, the Bark, Bellow & Roar
Are Waves that Beat on Heaven's Shore.

The Babe that weeps the Rod beneath
Writes Revenge in realms of death.

The Beggar's Rags, fluttering in Air,
Does to Rags the Heavens tear.

The Soldier arm'd with Sword & Gun,
Palsied strikes the Summer's Sun.

The poor Man's Farthing is worth more
Than all the Gold on Afric's Shore.

One Mite wrung from the Labrer's hands
Shall buy & sell the Miser's lands:
Or, if protected from on high,
Does that whole Nation sell & buy.

He who mocks the Infant's Faith
Shall be mock'd in Age & Death.

He who shall teach the Child to Doubt
The rotting Grave shall ne'er get out.

He who respects the Infant's faith
Triumph's over Hell & Death.

The Child's Toys & the Old Man's Reasons
Are the Fruits of the Two seasons.

The Questioner, who sits so sly,
Shall never know how to Reply.

He who replies to words of Doubt
Doth put the Light of Knowledge out.

The Strongest Poison ever known
Came from Caesar's Laurel Crown.

Nought can deform the Human Race
Like the Armour's iron brace.

When Gold & Gems adorn the Plow
To peaceful Arts shall Envy Bow.

A Riddle or the Cricket's Cry
Is to Doubt a fit Reply.

The Emmet's Inch & Eagle's Mile
Make Lame Philosophy to smile.

He who Doubts from what he sees
Will ne'er believe, do what you Please.

If the Sun & Moon should doubt
They'd immediately Go out.

To be in a Passion you Good may do,
But no Good if a Passion is in you.

The Whore & Gambler, by the State
Licenc'd, build that Nation's Fate.

The Harlot's cry from Street to Street
Shall weave Old England's winding Sheet.

The Winner's Shout, the Loser's Curse,
Dance before dead England's Hearse.

Every Night & every Morn
Some to Misery are Born.

Every Morn & every Night
Some are Born to sweet Delight.

Some ar Born to sweet Delight,
Some are born to Endless Night.

We are led to Believe a Lie
When we see not Thro' the Eye
Which was Born in a Night to Perish in a Night
When the Soul Slept in Beams of Light.

God Appears & God is Light
To those poor Souls who dwell in the Night,

But does a Human Form Display
To those who Dwell in Realms of day.

 

- William Blake

Joe's Angels

Uncle Joe's Angels at his BBQ on Sunday to celebrate his birthday (altho' technically he is not the oldest). The gals addressed him as Uncle because he is over 30 (muwahahahah). In the photo - moi, CW, Sandy, Liz, Joe, Fenni, Fistri, Ade


The BBQ was great. Some of us brought him bottles of wine but believe it or not, the guy does not have a wine opener! We had to sms another guest who was on the way to buy one. We were pretty thristy and impatient by the time the gadget arrived.

I am more of a wine taster than a drinker. It is more enjoyable for me if I drink and chew it in with the food. To drink it on its own, it will have to really fabulous wine, or sweet; obviously, not a connoisseur. It's the conversation and the hanging out that I enjoy more, the drink is just an excuse. Besides, it makes my face goes redder than I like and it is quite tiresome fighting float mode; not really worth all that trouble over a so-so wine. So I usually just sip sip sip with tolerance. It is great to have lots of different wines to try out (and hopefully someone else to finish the rest up). When I chance upon one that is good, it is quite a thrill.

Seems like the food one can almost always expect in a sgp local party is bee hoon, curry chicken, fish ball, satay. Joe's sister made the curry and it was excellent! I found BBQed Corn on Cob really tasty. Joe also BBQed some interesting spicy gravy over squid wrapped in foil. Good ideas for future BBQ.

Nite of Stars

That was the theme of my company's dinner and dance last Friday. The organisers worked very hard but alas not enough people took the trouble to dress up for it. Some of us did and added something of ourselves to it and came away with more; more in the form of another fabric to add to the richness of our memories.



Contenders for the Best Dressed.>>



My favourite is Lara Croft (before & After)



Hollywood meets Bollywood?>>



Fiery and CW (who sits opp. me at work). No, I didn't win the best dressed. Sigh, not enough X-factor. Not hiao enough.

I imagine this piece of music would have been perfect to go with the dress: "wo yao...wo yao ni...wo yao ni de ai...." (an old and famous chinese song that croons,"I want...I want you...I want your love...") Slut.

The Sims

My keleng neighbour (on the right of my apartment) has strangely quietened down considerably in the past week or so. I hope it stays that way. Sometimes I hear a child crying, so it might be that his wife returned. My guess is he toned down because of his family, Or, had been told off again by my other neighbour, Mr.Sim (who stays on the left side of my apartment). That has happened once before, more than a year ago. Mr.Sim told me the story himself.

Mr. Sim is quite a character. He is in his 60s and is pleasant, harmless looking enough except for the tattoos on the underside of his legs and arms (isn't that the more tender side to tattoo on - Ouch!). He lives with his wife and an older bachelor son. He's got a girlfriend that visits every other day and even stays over with his family while the rest of the neighbours think that is his daughter; his wife let slip about this in a conversation. He has a younger son (also another character). who is married with a boy and girl and who lives in the next block.

His story about the incident - it happened in the wee hours of the morning, like 4am. My keleng neighbour was talking so loudly that Mr.Sim's household was woken up. So Mr.Sim stormed over to scold him. It must have been a big disturbance in the corridor; thank gawd, I was away on some trip at that time. He challenged the other guy to think twice before messing with him. He lifted the back of his shirt to show the tattoos on his back and those on his arms and legs, and warned my Indian neighbour,"Do not think I have a simple background, okay, I have been to places. You can tell from my tattoos." The warning was effective for the neighbourhood became peaceful for many months after that. My keleng neighbour even went over to seek Mr.Sim's forgiveness during Deepavali last year, but seems like his memory span is short.

I found Mr.Sim's married son very strange when I first moved in. He comes by to visit his parents every day and of course, passes my door, sometimes several times a day as though he doesn't work or is doing freelance work. I was very uncomfortable with him because he is the only one in the family who would not return a greeting and pretended he didn't see me. Yet, he had tried to peep into my apartment when he thought I wasn't looking. If he asked, I would have taken him on a tour but he would rather pretend disinterest when his curiosity was there. That pretense made me wary of his motives so much so that, John and VianNa talked about helping me install a surveillance camera in my corridor but in the end, gave me a motion door chime (thanks guys).

Funnily, a year ago, I recognised Mr.Sim's son in a picture in the newspapers. He was in uniform and holding a rifle, while walking down Orchard road or something. It was an article about more security patrolling the streets to deter terrorists. I mentioned that to Mr.Sim and finally found out his son is in the Police and was a Minister's bodyguard. Sheesh. That explained his suspicious and stern demeanour. It was a great relief.

After that discovery, I am now somewhat amused that under the covers of the mundane life that is in HDB estate lies crouching tigers and hidden dragons.

Anyway

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish motives; be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you have anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it never was between you and them anyway.

- Mother Teresa

Quote

Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books. - anonymous

Christmas Tree Light Up

The Tanglin Club celebrated the light up of their Christmas Tree in their lobby.

The lobby was packed. The choir sang for half an hour before the lobby was dimmed for the tree to be lighted up. More carols followed and finished with the arrival of the ang moh Dua Peh Kong (or literally 'red hair big old grandpa' in hokkien ).

The large turnout took the staff by surprise. They estimated 450 people but 700 people turned up! Apparently the membership seats have opened up and doubled. Before, some people would be on wait list for as long as ten years to get in.

At the reception, we had stollen, cookies, mint pies and a wonderful drink called mockwine which I have never tried before. It was warm with a beautiful bouquet of fruit flavour. The waiter mentioned the wine was cooked with ingredients such as orange peel, lemon peel, cinnamon, port, almonds, and other wonderful secret stuff.

Lights on Scotts Road

Rattle

While doing my housekeeping recently, I discovered this rattle I bought (~8) years ago in the gift shop in St.Charles training campus,Chicago which sold corporate branded goods. I have forgotten about it but to find it now - unbelievable! Now it sure comes in useful.


Kit laughs at his own mirror image and loves to be kissed.

Recent Reading

While I was on vacation and on the road, I bought a number of books:

* What would Buddha do? Answers to Life's Daily Dilemmas (Frantz Metcalf) *

Each page is a question about an ordinary situation like "what would Buddha do about getting drunk?", followed by a quote and an advice. It is easy to read and provides sensible advice. Helpful towards warming my mind up for contemplation. I am sobered by the quotation attached to this question on "What would Buddha do in picking a partner?", which says "If on the path you don't meet your equal, it's best to travel alone. There's no fellowship with fools - Dhammapada 61". Yes, I guess the feeling would be an even more lonely one made ironical by the companionship.

* Vegas Rich *

A trash novel about some poor simple (beautiful, of cos) woman who came to inherit a huge fortune from an old man who took a fancy to her (who was horizontally accessible, of cos)and how she then went on to learn to read and build an empire and had a couple of gorgeous-looking but problematic sons and their lives, etc. I picked it up at the airport to kill boredom and as something to put me to sleep on the plane. I didn't need to use it in the end since the oxygen level turned down during the flight put everyone to sleep anyway (a flight crew trick). I lugged it with me for all those miles but finished the novel only after I got home, as bedside reading. The writer merely added words on the pages with large gapping holes in his story. The lines fed nothing to the brain nor the soul. Deprived, my eyelids eventually sank over my eyes. So the book did its job.


* Look before you leap: preparing for marriage (Pastor J.John) *


I bought this in Watford out of curiosity and the cashier in the bookstore looked extremely pleased that I was supporting their local writer. She got chatty and even asked if I was buying it for myself. Panic. I got embarassed for I did not know how to explain myself if more questions followed, so I blurted a lie that I was getting it for a friend. I didn't think she believed me but I guess it was enough for her.

It turned out to be an excellent book and explained systematically how to assess our value system and know what makes a suitable match for ourselves. I guess most of it we vaguely know or are aware of but never quite bring ourselves to face it, especially when our hearts are already in the situation. We make excuses. We make compromises. We believe love conquers all. The element of practicality that runs through this book broadens upon the common views held today. Without being judgemental, the writer brings us through the pros and cons of the choices we make with the way we are involved in relationships. I wish I got to read this when I was twenty (oh, that was not too long ago or at least that is how it feels..) This book makes a great present but you will have to pick the right timing. Giving this to someone at his/her wedding would be somewhat late...


* Dos and Don'ts in Thailand (3rd edition, published by Booknet)*


People buy travel books when they travel. I like to get those relating to culture, culture shock issues, customs. So this is one of them. While in Bangkok, I bought this because it looks very comprehensive and is written in a light easy tone. Despite this, it dwells in a greater depth than the usual cultural books covering customs relating to festivals or special occasions like wedding, funeral, etc.

This one, for example, has a chapter on Thai's people view of their Monarchy which is important to highlight. I remember meeting Enrique after he first moved to Thailand and still had not assimilated into the society. Yet, he spoke in hush tones when he mentioned the Thai royal family and cautioned me against offending the public by raising questions or comments unintentionally about the royal family. The Thais have an almost holy respect for their royalty, totally unlike many countries with a monarchy. It left a deep impression on me about the sensitivity of the topic. So it is appropriate to highlight this gravity to foreigners.

The book also covers topics about darker side of life such bars and massage parlours, etc. There is a chapter for the men and even one for the women (because a few tourist girls have lost their lives).

For a country so steeped in customs and manners, it is fascinating that it embraces such diversity, such contradictions with an amazing tolerance and also resilient to external influences. Since many of us travel to Thailand often, this looks like a great book for a present too.